得到之后, 却迷失了下一个目标.

What is my next thing to do? What's my next goal?

希望可以从工作中得到新的启示.

Indeed, life has never disappointed me.

First thing is that I deleted Windows XP on my laptop and installed Mac OS Tiger instead.

Fedora already existed and configured properly.

 

Seems that Tiger doesn't recognize my ethernet adapter yet.

 

Second thing is that I am finally "eligible" to unwrap the iPod video which I hid in the closest a few months ago.

It is cool, the only shortfall is that, it is too "crystal clear". So ease to catch scratch, dust and finger prints.

 

When I picked up the phone, I heard "You got the position". It was like the most beautiful voice I have ever heard in my life.

 

I was THRILLED, though after such a long period of waiting, I couldn't possibly be as excited as if I got it on the second day of the interview, it did cheer me up. Actually, I'd rather say, the waiting and the anxiety about my future that I had these days, are really memorable. I shall never ever forget it and that's why I struggled and finally decided to put it down here.

 

"Welcome aboard." said my boss.

 

LONG LIVE THE IBM EMPIRE!

 

XD

Unbeatable is the desireless.

 

I ve been waiting for it for a few weeks. I havent had the feeling for at least 3 years already, the feeling that holds your breath. Anxiety, sleepless, daydreaming are the symptoms. Everything can affect my emotion, even the most subtle ones. Reluctent to go to school; not even want to move or eat, nor even if the dinner is lobster. Staring at the screen for nothing but repeatively click on refresh, maybe every few seconds. An hour is like a century, so hard for the minute hand to move one grid, so hard for the heart to calm down. Yet I can do nothing about it. Feel the energy, the power, accumulated and congested my body, but I have nowhere to release it.

 

The saying flickered in my mind, when I was on a street car on the way home. I suddenly realized how weak I am, even a breeze can bring me down. O well.

 

Still trapped in the feeling. So hard, and takes so long to get rid of.

 

...

 

Silent, in my room, dark. It is like a star, blinking right in front of my eyes. And I am determined. I will go to TKD tonight. The art that brought me the confidence and healthy mentality, as well as the unbeatable spirit...

 

The class was fun. Though I felt dizzy for a few minutes, due to 3 months of absence, I did had a good time and felt my power was fully released. Hurt and sweat wakened up my spirit.

 

Up to now, I am still waiting. Fortunately enough, there is still a chance, an increasing one. But the waiting itself is a dangerous and brutal process. Yet once you stepped out of it and look back, somehow it doesn't seem to be as hard. And the experience will just be another memory of 2006.

 

 

 

 

 

 

就像无底洞. 深不可测.